Music - Do it your self?

I've seen a trend with couples wanting to save a little money on their wedding and cutting an important part of their wedding. Their DJ! A DJ provides a much needed service for most weddings, they introduce the couple, they provide a fun environment for everyone, the get people involved, but that's not all. They provide experiance! I was helping my niece pick out some songs for her wedding before she met with her DJ and I will tell you it's hard. What music to you you have the mothers walk down to? I've shot a lot of weddings and never knew the names of these songs or even where to find them. Sure google is great, but that leaves you still looking for the music. What song are you going to cut your cake to? what song will your bridal party dance to? etc.. and really important, what songs make people just want to get up and DANCE?

My suggestion is find a good DJ and hire him for his services and personality he will bring to your wedding and reception. I couldn't believe all the options and all the various artist out there doing wedding music, and unless your friend has this experiance and collection of music I think you will be happier with a REAL DJ. I've got a couple in my perferred vendors that we have worked with that you can start with, but really do your home work, find one that you like.

Memorials

Weddings are a time to remember but not to necessarily dwell on lost family members. A small dedication of flowers on an alter is not unheard of. Some couples choose to do a little more, lighting a candle in memory of a lost member. We’ve even see a small speech. What you do is up to you, just remember not to let it set the mood for the rest of the day.

One wedding we attended a few years back where the bride just lost her grandmother a week before the wedding was rather touching emotionally. One of the family members that was in the wedding was to read a poem, when he got up to read it he made it through about 10 words before he was in tears. I was thankful I had a camera to shield me, because if I was just a guest I would have joined him and half the guests.

Personally I like the candle idea or small memorial table places somewhere off to the side so it don’t flavor the whole wedding.

On a happy note:

I heard on the radio today that the Recession is officially OVER! Hopefully everyone is in agreement on this and it really is and I’ve had the last person that wanted a full blown wedding package with Albums, Engagement sessions and a ton of prints to display call to inform me that they have decided to let their Uncle Fred (or a friend) take their pictures. See our blog at http://georgestarrphotography.blogspot.com for more on this subject as it is important to couples trying to cut costs.

Music - Play lists

Music is a very important to your wedding, Selecting your song, and those that are on your play list is important if you want to control a little bit of the feel of your reception. If everyone hates RAP music you don't want the DJ playing a RAP music song every other song. A good DJ will sit down with you and go over what he can play, and even help you pick appropiate music for Dinner and the other dance events. If he is unwilling to do this, you might want to reconsider his services. Again check out your DJ if you can.

This is a short post today, later this week I'll post a more serious one if time allows for it.

Kids at your wedding!

Having children at a wedding brings life to the wedding, sometimes a little chaos. Some brides choose to do a no children wedding and reception which is okay but can prevent some guests from being able to attend the wedding and/or reception. At the wedding ceremony kids are normally pretty well behaved, babies have some issues, especially with the longer ceremonies. We have seen several have to be taken out by Mom or Dad crying, it happens and if it does don’t worry about it, it’s life. After the wedding ceremony kids get a little on restless side if they are kept around for pictures.

At the reception, kids have a tendency to go a little wild, they have just went through a long time in church (20 minutes to sit still is a long time) and have a lot of energy. This is where you hope the parents keep a little control or you have kids circling around under foot when you are announced, when you are eating, when you are dancing your first dance, and generally all the time if they are permitted.

What is a couple to do? Well you can ask the parents to keep the kids under control, have the DJ ban the kids from the dance floor at key moments, and these work pretty good. Now there are a few thing more a couple can do. If you think like a kid what would be neat to do? We’ve seen craft areas set up, even kids sections/tables for dinner, that had fun things for the kids to do. Now not all parents will want their smaller children at separate tables, but it will keep a few occupied. We’ve even seen kids plates prepared for them, and a kids buffet line with kid friendly food.

You can do kids events too, kids want to be included in the fun. Single guys and girls have a Bouquet and Garter toss, why not do something like this for the kids. Do a Candy Sucker Bouquet and include them all, just make sure everyone gets something (extra suckers or something). We have seen separate dance areas for kids to keep the off the main dance floor. I would at least have the DJ ask the parents to keep the kids off the dance floor for the formal dances. After all you don’t want tripped, or to have to dodge kids running around during your first dance. Plus the pictures will turn out. At our wedding, during our first dance, one of my older nieces toddlers broke away onto the dance floor just crossing to the other side, my niece ran after her and the two of them almost took us out.

As you can see from the picture though, not all pictures are ruined by children. and we snapped a few without them showing up too. These kids had a blast and I bet they slept very good that night.

INLAWS – OUTLAWS and more

Dealing with your inlaws has just begun, I’m sure you have your issues, not everyone gets along with their new extended families. Your wedding day shouldn’t be stressful, however, they have their ideas and you have yours and sometimes they don’t agree. What is a couple to do? Well first off remember Don’t fight about it. Most reasonable people will, if you explain to them what you want and why, come around to seeing your way or at least explain their point of view. Getting the issues you know you will have out in the open early is a very good idea so that on your wedding day everyone agrees on how things will take place.

The question on some items is should you give in? Well the answer is YES and NO! If you give in on some smaller things then the major things you WIN will not be as big of a loss for the inlaws. Believe it or not everyone wants what they think is best for you on your big day. You don’t want a disagreement on your wedding day. People have a need to be needed, you might find that you can create a need for you inlaws that just “HAVE TO HELP!” You might put someone in charge of picking up the tuxes, or dealing with the florist, or helping the cake person making sure the cake goes where it needs to go and is how you want it.

One good piece of advice for you and your soon to be spouse it do discuss your feelings and know what your true limits are. For example and this is silly I know, but know that you can not tell her father he can’t walk her down the isle. Okay that was never a real disagreement with a couple, but as long as I mentioned that, another issue to consider is who does walk you down the isle if you have divorced parents.

Along with divorced families comes a whole separate set of problems, we see it at picture time but it’s there for every thing. Where do you sit the new spouses, who dance with the bride or groom first. I like to see these extended families come together for this one day and get along although it doesn’t always happen. There was a reason for them to separate and some people just don’t want to be close to someone they can’t stand to be around. Inform your Photographer and DJ or these issues so they know how to handle the “Parent Issue”

With a little thought to how people feel you can make your day a day to remember (in a good day) for everyone involved.

Btw: I normally do a people picture here... I wasn't going to touch adding a person to this one..